how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize