chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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