it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
is it fun? or sober?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
