that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
