Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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