Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize