I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
