so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Ladies don't puke and tell
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
