Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize