yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
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