so that wasnt chicken after all
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
did you just send me my own nude
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
