so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
