stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
I have post one night stand depression
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