Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
