I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
