Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
