HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I think I sprained my soul last night
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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