I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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