You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
