Jerry, you need to find god
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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