wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
It's just like the Real World with babies
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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