sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
