I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
This girl is more easily done than said...
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Randomize
