There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
