I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
