I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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