? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
