I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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