Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
