It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
