i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
