Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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