Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
is wine microwaveable?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
