seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
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