arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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