If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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