dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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