i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
