Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
