i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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