This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Life is so much better after having sex.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
