I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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