Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
