I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
