everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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