What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Randomize
