why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Randomize
