No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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