oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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