I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize