Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
